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Valentina's Diary

The Diary of Spiritual Discoveries by Valentina

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September 20, 2025

The Psychology of Identity – How your new You will make your Life better

Whatever you decide for yourself to be today, you may embrace that new version effortlessly. Photo: Pexels

From one of my recent conversations I’ve had and from one of the last books I’ve read, I came to the following conclusion. The only thing that exists, is the present moment. The past is a moment that exists only in our memory, while the future exists only in our imagination.

Everything we’ve known about ourselves – the identity we identify ourselves with – lies in the past, as the most recent situations we remember of ourselves, have already passed. Hence, we invent ourselves new in every passing moment! So far, so clear, no?

How we constantly, unknowingly recreate ourselves

Now, our brains prefer what is familiar, what it knows it can handle, to what is good, to what could make us happy. Happiness, oftentimes, lies in the unknown, making our minds subconsciously scared of it, which is why often, without even being aware of it, we don’t choose happiness for ourselves, even if we could.

This means, that because our minds prefer the familiar, we choose to reinvent ourselves as the almost exact copy of who we were yesterday. Because that was ‘good enough’.

The Power and Privilege of Choice

However, what we don’t realize is that we could wake up everyday, choosing to be a different version of ourselves. A version we never have been before. Nothing holds us back from reading a book we never would have read. From wearing clothes we wouldn’t normally consider. Taking different routes to work everyday. Calling someone we haven’t spoken to in a while. Being a little bit brave and taking a chance with doing something we have never done before.

We could do all of this. Yet, usually we simply don’t. We don’t, because we can’t predict the outcomes, because we can’t control other people’s reactions, because we simply don’t know what this new experience would bring.

The Beauty of the Unknown

Yet, we don’t understand that in the unknown lies the magic. If we ever only do what we’ve known, we will only ever experience what is familiar. This is called the comfort zone. And while ‘comfort zone’ sounds like such a snuggly place that people usually don’t go above and beyond to escape once in a while, we don’t realize that that is exactly where we stay small.

In our comfort zones, we will never find things that excite us (because all familiarity at some point loses its spark to us), the things that give us new meaning, the things that make us better, the things that transform us into new people and that make our lives outstanding, rather than ‘comfortable.

How Familiarity kills us, slowly but surely

Without being aware of it, we have created a firm identity for ourselves, that we follow more loyally than anything else. Everyday, we wake up and we choose to leave the house as the exact same version of who we were yesterday, limiting ourselves to the experiences of yesterday.

Easily, we could create a better, far improved version of ourselves. We could make ourselves braver, less timid, less shy, less anxious, less fearful, bolder, more daring, more confident. Everything that’s holding you back can be transformed into something that will bring you ahead.

And how a little bit of guts goes a long way

You just need to give that improved version of you a voice and some trust. Let her leave the house in your body today! Let her make the decision, and have the conversations and let her apply for new opportunities. The more brave we are, the more new experiences we seek – experiences outside of the familiar – the more diverse and fulfilling will our lives be.

And if we ever stop once in a while, and let each moment sink in a little, we realize that we can actually handle almost everything, even the most uncomfortable, risky and unfamiliar moments.

Wear your Identity like your Cape of Courage

You can control who you are and you can also choose which identity you want to take on during this day. An identity that doesn’t have to be the same as yesterday, or the day before that. You don’t have to be a fearful person, dreading the unknown. Instead, you can be that version you don’t really dare of imagining yourself to be.

You just have to decide this for yourself. That’s the energy you now radiate and this energy you will attract. That’s when the energies align again and you attract new, better experiences for yourself.

You will, by the law of attraction, have the life the identity you gave yourself has in your imagination. That’s when the best manifestations happen!

Let me know how that identity looks for you, and what made your days better because of it!

Love, Valentina <3

Written by Valentina – spiritual writer & founder of Valentina’s Diary

Posted In: Blog, Vibrations and Energy · Tagged: Energy

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  • What to do when you don’t know if you’re on the right path
  • How to turn Authenticity into your super-power – And why we need it to be happy
  • 8 great Things I discovered give life meaning and fulfill
  • Why living Life as a loser is very non-spiritual
  • Don’t let your own biggest enemy live in your head – How to kick him out for good
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blog.valentinasdiary

The Diary of Spiritual Discoveries

I can't believe it'already 27 months and 100 blog I can't believe it'already 27 months and 100 blog posts later since I first started my blog ✨

This anniversary-blog I called "How to turn authenticity into your super-power — And why we need it to be happy"

Thank you for being part of my readership!

#blog #spirituality #authenticity #valentinasdiary
This is the best of what I've written so far about This is the best of what I've written so far about Self-growth and Self-Improvement ✨

1. 8 great things I discovered give life meaning and fulfill

2. Why living life as a loser is very non-spiritual

3. 6 hard truths to underdtand for spiritual growth and a better life 

4. Don't let your own biggest enemy live in your head - and how to kick it out for good

5. The Psychology of identity - how your new you will make your life better

6. Don't stay little when you could be great 

7. A positive mindset - when your attitude is all you have left 

8. The beauty of change - how to embrace it unapologetically 

9. Do we ever stop growing? And should we?

10. To achieve internal happiness: You have to figure out these two things

Let me know how you liked these ones 🤞
#selfgrowth #selfimprovement #selfgrowthjourney #spirituality
These are 10 Spiritual Lessons and Values I think These are 10 Spiritual Lessons and Values I think every kid should definitely learn in order to grow up happy and healthy! Let me know if you agree, or if you can think of any more :)) 

#spiritualvalues #spirituallessons #whatyouneedtoteachyourkids
6 Essays on Love and Relationships in Spirituality 6 Essays on Love and Relationships in Spirituality... on valentinasdiary.com. 

1. To love someone is to know them

2. Can we look for love? Or 10 Things we can do to find it faster

3. Does the universe fight for souls to be together?

4. Spiritual Relationships - This is what your relationships mean 

5. Implementing spirituality into your dating life is important - Here's why...

6. What are soulmates and how can we find them? 

#spirituality #love #dating #relationships #soulmates #universe
Find here 10 of my all-time favourite books about Find here 10 of my all-time favourite books about spirituality! They all talk about different aspects; destiny, manifestation and energy, life after death and how we choose our new lives, how we can improve our lives through our attitudes and ways of thinking, how to find happiness in the present moment and how to reach enlightenment. 

Some are fiction, some are not, but they all contain their little eye-opening messages that will definitely make you want to pursue a more spiritual life! Find the links to all these books in my book-highlight or on my library-page on my blog (valentinasdiary.com). 

1. The Alchimist, Paulo Coelho

2. Journey of Souls, Dr. Michael Newton

3. Becoming Supernatural, Dr. Joe Dispenza

4. The Power of Now, Eckhart Tolle

5. Way of the peaceful Warrior, Dan Millman

6. The monk who sold his Ferrari, Robin Sharma

7. The Dalai Lama's cat, David Richie

8. The Secret, Rhonda Byrne

9. Sex mit dem Universum, Laura Malina Seiler

10. 101 Essays that will change the way you think, Brianna Wiest

Happy reading! ✨📚

#spiritualbooks #booksaboutspirituality #readinglist #bestbooks #inspirationalreading
I'm excited to share my top 10 blogs I posted over I'm excited to share my top 10 blogs I posted over the last two years. From love, to destiny, to energy, to the nature of the soul, to life philosophy. Spirituality is such a vast topic! Read more to explore which topic speaks most to you. And let me know what you thought while reading 😊

1. How to get to know your Soul - Your inner world and higher Self

2. The Power of Art - And how Souls need Self-Expression

3. Can we look for Love? Or 10 Things we can do to find it faster! 

4. 10 spiritual Values you need to teach your Kids! 

5. The Beauty of Change - How to embrace it unapologetically

6. To love someone is to know them

7. You can't fail in Life - And here is what I mean by that

8. The Power (and Art) of Travel

9. Does the universe fight for Souls to be together?

10. Read this when you don't like your Life or Yourself

All texts are available under valentinasdiary.com. Find the Link in my bio! Thanks for reading 🥰
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