A positive mindset can lift us up, when we could easily be dragged down by life. Photo: Pexels
Because I know what it’s like to feel stuck in life, I want to dedicate this blog to all of you who feel lost, stuck, don’t know what to do or where to go in life, can’t seem to get their lives together or their chaos in order. I know what it’s like.
And after so much trial and error I – finally – realized that sometimes our attitudes are all we have left. Let me try to fix your shitty attitude and turn it into a positive mindset. Because now, that’s exactly what you need.
Try until there is nothing else to do
To give you some context; I have been looking for a job for months on end now and let me tell you that I did not expect this to be so difficult. I have reached a point where I try to fill my days with things to do, in order to not lay in bed, doing absolutely nothing with my precious time and wasting away.
And people underestimate how hard it can be to pick yourself up over and over again when you could just let yourself go. After months of applying it has become hard not to take rejection personal.
And sometimes, no matter what you do, no matter how many new hobbies you try, how much you travel, how much you try to go outside or meet up with friends or both, you can still feel like you have achieved nothing.
So, what do you do after there is nothing more to try anymore? When you have tried until you can try no more?
Don’t take things personal
Every day I have to remind myself of this. No rejection is a personal attack. It is just something that did not align with what was supposed to be in your life. It just wasn’t supposed to be there and so entry was denied. Of course, that is only the case because what is actually meant to be for you will find its way into your life, may that be the case sooner or later.
And sometimes we have to wait a little. But usually, the harder you work for something and the more patient you are, the better the outcome is.
In the meantime, the only thing you can do is try to pick yourself up after every fall, dust yourself off and carry on again.
Uncertainty is not failure
This is another hard thing I had to realize. My whole life I was so focused on a specific end goal. At 12 years old you start to study hard to get into certain schools. And from then on it’s mostly about how much you can achieve.
How many languages can you learn, how many courses can you take, how much can you network, how many internships can you complete and how well can you write your exams. The goal is to get into a good uni or get some other great professional education and eventually land an amazing job.
And then suddenly, school’s over and you’re thrown out into the world. And if you don’t find something immediately, you face uncertainty, maybe for the first time. I mention this because I know that scarcity on the job market is a problem our entire generation is affected by, as it seems. Some more than others, but still.
However, uncertainty is not something you will never experience in your life again. And so I had to force myself to understand that now, I just get an opportunity to practice embracing this uncertainty. Practice acceptance, patience, trust. And I think those are some hardcore-spiritual values to learn. So, good for you (for us)!
However, there is one thing that uncertainty is not. And that’s failure.
Before order, there needs to be chaos
Lately, I have been telling myself that I want to get my life in order. But I just can’t seem to arrive anywhere. Can’t seem to manage changing whatever it is that makes me so uneasy. And then my friend told me that, usually, our lives first get harder, before they get good. Before something big happens.
If there was no chaos, you would have nothing you could fix, organize, get done. Things first need to get a little messy before we can start cleaning up again. That’s the case for all situations, really. For relationships, financial situations, jobs, education, a new beginning, diet and fitness, renovations, a new project, anything.
The one thing that will enable you to see much clearer through this fog of uncertainty, that will calm your inner chaos and anxiety, is your attitude. In fact, a positive mindset will be the game changer and the initiator of all good things.
A positive mindset – The ultimate game changer
So, not too long ago I realized that I have been trying to get my life going for a while now and not stay stuck in this endless cycle of unknowing. Not knowing what my next job will be, where I should move, whether I should play it safe or take some risks. And eventually I just got tired of my negative attitude.
I told myself, things might not be working out the way you want them too. So the only thing you can control is how you approach this situation.
It’s not helpful to take this personally. Thinking you’re not doing good enough, you’re not capable of change, you’re not needed… Because that is how I have been feeling. You might as well train your mind to be nice to yourself again.
I try to make it a habit to remind myself that I, in fact, am valuable and some company will see that too. That I can actually achieve things I put my mind on. That I am good enough. And that things will work out exactly the way it’s meant to happen.
We need to collectively learn to be more patient, more trusting, and take each day as life presents it to us. That’s where we can get the most change; in the now, dedicating ourselves to something. You need a positive mindset in the process of achieving your dreams. Because what else can you do?
Love, Valentina <3
P.S. A positive mindset vibrates on higher frequencies than a negative one, making manifestations come more easily into our lives. That’s why I started a manifestation journal, to train my mindset into being a better one.
Written by Valentina – spiritual writer & founder of Valentina’s Diary
